The sun dwindles upon the eyes of it’s viewers. Hoping, wishing, praying for a better life that lays beyond. Working till the mid-night hours, thinking of the promise land that they soon will join their dreams with reality. A place worth fighting for.
When ever lost I turn to the ocean. The vast blue calling my name to the unknown that lays beyond it. Where will it lead? Where will it take me?
Questions that I can only answer myself when I get there. Choosing that path not cause it’s safe, but because deep down it feels right… A taste of something new. A feeling of something scary, but honest.
The destination is sometimes unknown, but the experience getting there is worth all the while.
I ride into the night, letting the cool air sway with my body, the wheels of my skateboard drift along the smooth streets of Brooklyn under the evening skies. My mind races fast, all the events that surround me, career, love, family, passion, ups and downs.
I first think of love, with the heavy hits I have endured. The highs and predictable lows of one love after another, knowing in the end that you have always just been a rebound lover. Out of all those crazy nights, not one of them had ever whispered “I love you.” Solo you walk the streets, wondering who you will meet, share, cherish, and finally get to hear those three little words from.
Still you skate on, letting your anger and rage melt away with the sounds of the gentle breeze of the night.
You think of your family, the love they give you, the pain they hold and tell through their eyes, but yet won’t speak a drop of it. An uncle you can only reach by phone, hearing his lonely cries as he speaks true poetry and truth, and yet you cry, knowing no one will listen to him like you do. Praying to some God, that someone will some day.
Still, you ride through the night. Listening to the cool and soft breeze.
You think of your career, the tilting point, everything is on the line. Your gonna risk it all for your art, not in an act of selfishness, but for the pure essence of art that most others are blind to see, the act of giving.
All forces of nature work against you, even those who are privileged, but yet you fight the fight, cause you have something to say… Something you stand for.
But yet, you skate on carving up the street, passing the late night drivers in this silent summer night. Feeling like you did 13,000 feet above sea level in Colorado. Snowboarding and Riding untouched trails in the Rocky Mountain back country. Gliding through mounds of snow, high in the heavens, like you can touch God. Speeding down an incline that no man would dare, carving though snow like butter, and in the moment knowing you are untouchable. And you know that in this life you will be and forever untouchable. To take the hits and move. Life is to short to stop the skate, the ride, the enjoyment of all the little things that make a journey.
Childhood dreams lost by the mentality of an adult. A change when age takes over and the loss of your original identity has drifted far away.
Everything you’ve ever wanted, now denied by your social surroundings. Now believing that the dream is impossible. A death wish or a failed future, but yet, no one would dare to tell you that failure can still find you even if you turned your back on that once childhood dream…
Some days I walk alone… Blocking out the noise, the comments, things that draw me apart from who I am. People can give you a thousand reasons not to do the one thing you dreamed of… The one thing that sets you apart. That makes you…you.
Living in fear that “one” thing will fly off, like an autumn leaf in the middle of a wind gust, never to be seen by your eyes again. Only remembered and later forgotten, that something great was once there, with in you.
There are days when I wonder what lays beyond the sunset. A place where we all race to, searching for a paradise that rests on the other side. Where the sky’s are cream colored with reds, oranges, and pinks. A place where the adventure never ends.
Is it heaven, or my own envision of heaven? The mystery will always be, will I ever see the place beyond the skyline…The place in which my own happiness rests.
I wish to return to a world where all is simple, a straight path with no whines and turns, a straight shoot to a happy life… But the easier they say things are as the years race by, the harder it is to manage ourselves.
Only if we could walk the straight path once again…
Confessions of a Rebound Lover:
As I walk in and out of the shadows of the night, I soak in the nightlife of what New York has to give me. Swimming in my head, searching for answers I can not find.
Time and time again I wonder if it was always me. An escape for one to tell their love, passion, heart, someone that would listen. Listen to the voice we all hide trying to claw its way out deep with in the diaphragm.
A few weeks of perfect romance, her head buried on what seemed to be its final resting place… Soon to just be a faded memory, forgotten in time like tears in rain… The smiles, the laughs, the sex, a distant memory of every single night you shared. All gone now, as each of their interests turn back to the one they ran from.
One by one they return, a new face, a new story, each taking a piece of me. Soon to just be another rebound lover as I stroll the midnight streets of New York again and again…
As you walk the streets of Bushwick, Brooklyn on a hot summer night, you can hear the foreign sounds of music in its infancy stage of something new. Something new that will grow in the next few years, but nothing like discovering something when it’s just starting out!
Deep in the bowels of Brooklyn, experimental electronic music starts to take over. I’ve listened to all types of music, but this kind gets me. It’s hard to follow, dance to, ect. The only people that seem to enjoy it are the one’s who make it.
When the DJ sets up, it looks so complex that I’m expecting this crazy sound to come blasting out. Only to reveal nothing but “BEEPS” and “FUZZ.” Only good thing it does is that the DJs just sit, so I have time to take a good photo.